Simone’s panel layout is full of movement, and if the hourglass panel was more rounded (like I know she is making it), I think it will read more as an hourglass than an X shape. The humour reads well to me, and the story is easy enough to follow along. The variety of face angles adds to the panel layout’s sense of movement, which is a good choice. The oasis (which I know she will fix) could benefit from a more elongated shape rather than a circle, perhaps if one end turned into a slight stream leading off panel. The characters are distinguishable enough from one another thanks to the individual fashion sense, and I am excited to see the wolf creature in more detail on her good copy!
The story establishes it’s settings and it’s stakes very well in the first few panels, and I find that it’s very easy to understand who the characters are and what is going on from a quick glance. My only suggestion would be that my eye skips over the second panel of the second page slightly, but I think that would be easily corrected by countering the details of the oasis and the wolves with a simpler setup in that panel, but I feel that is a direction that it might already be taking. I enjoy how the characters feel like they are as much a team as they are individuals, based on their different designs yet their proximity in their poses, and I look forward to seeing how they all look in the end!
Holly Bartels
Simone’s panel layout is full of movement, and if the hourglass panel was more rounded (like I know she is making it), I think it will read more as an hourglass than an X shape. The humour reads well to me, and the story is easy enough to follow along. The variety of face angles adds to the panel layout’s sense of movement, which is a good choice. The oasis (which I know she will fix) could benefit from a more elongated shape rather than a circle, perhaps if one end turned into a slight stream leading off panel. The characters are distinguishable enough from one another thanks to the individual fashion sense, and I am excited to see the wolf creature in more detail on her good copy!
Emma Guenther
The story establishes it’s settings and it’s stakes very well in the first few panels, and I find that it’s very easy to understand who the characters are and what is going on from a quick glance. My only suggestion would be that my eye skips over the second panel of the second page slightly, but I think that would be easily corrected by countering the details of the oasis and the wolves with a simpler setup in that panel, but I feel that is a direction that it might already be taking. I enjoy how the characters feel like they are as much a team as they are individuals, based on their different designs yet their proximity in their poses, and I look forward to seeing how they all look in the end!